Why Louisiana Republicans suck?

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Things I would like to Say episode 2.
Hello, and here are my reasons why Louisiana’s Republicans are full of shit.
1. Small Government: Jindal, Vitter, Col Maness, Dr. Cassidy, Rodney Alexander, Crouere, etc. claim they are for less government. However, where they stand and how they vote tell a different story. As in, their support for the Wall St Bailouts, the Drug War, the misguided Iraq War, criminalization of prostitution, troops on friendly foreign soil (even though there’s no real justification anymore), keeping an archaic/useless sodomy ban on the books, farm/seafood subsidies, and other forms of corporate welfare. In other words, you can be for small government or idiotically policing the world, but not both.
2. Pro-Life: If you guys claim to be for life, then why do you support the same failed policies that drown my generation (I refuse to call it “millennial”), along with those that haven’t been born, in debt, send us to die in a war that has lost its meaning while maintaining its funding, and subject us to religious indoctrination? Oops! Looks like you aren’t what you say you are.
3. Free Market: Again, I find myself repeating what I have already said. Supporting bailouts, subsidies, the copyright fascists, and tariffs while complaining about economic regulations automatically makes them hypocrites in my book. That, and the Jefferson Parish ordinance to shut down all the strip clubs is complete and utter shit. To be fair, Democrats are just as bad in this department. (Points at Mary Landrieu.)
4. Family: Claiming to be pro-family while destroying lots of families via the Drug War ought to nominate this state’s GOP politicians for the hall of shame. Furthermore, trying to deny Homosexuals from marrying or even adopting children is fucking stupid. Gee, I wonder why???
5. Criminal Justice: Speaking of the Drug War, or should I say glorified prohibition; Why is it that the Conservatards continue to push for the criminalization of consensual behavior between adults? Also, why is it that junkies have to serve a mandatory “minimum” sentence, whereas murderers, rapists, thieves, and the occasional terrorist get plea deals? Oh, I know! It’s because the Retardlicans aren’t any different from the prog-tards, right? Oh, and the notion that legalized drugs will cause a catastrophe is pure, unadulterated bullshit.
That’s all I have to say for this installment of Things I like to Say. Tune in next time in which I promote Gnash while giving Newgrounds its much-needed kick in the ass. On the other hand, I should tear a new vulva in Nina Paley’s shitty cartoons while the tearing’s good.

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